Forgotten
Author: Cat Patrick
Publication Date: 6/7/11
Publisher: Little Brown

Blurb (GR): Each night when 16 year-old London Lane goes to sleep, her whole world disappears. In the morning, all that's left is a note telling her about a day she can't remember. The whole scenario doesn't exactly make high school or dating that hot guy whose name she can't seem to recall any easier. But when London starts experiencing disturbing visions she can't make sense of, she realizes it's time to learn a little more about the past she keeps forgetting-before it destroys her future.

Part psychological drama, part romance, and part mystery, this thought-provoking novel will inspire readers to consider the what-if's in their own lives and recognize the power they have to control their destinies

Review:

_You had me, Cat Patrick. You had me for a significant portion of this novel. Then you totally lost me. You did, however, inspire me to read up on short-term memory loss. For those of you wondering what the heck that has to with anything, this book’s main character is a teenage girl who “resets” every morning around 4am. Each night, she writes notes for herself of things she needs to read for school, what she should wear tomorrow, and any developments with family and friends. The entire book keeps the reader wondering what the impetus for the memory loss was and whether London Lane (yes) will be able to regain some of her lost memories.

London’s mother and best friend know of her memory situation but there is no mention of anyone else knowing—do her peers her teachers know? I feel it is unbelievable if they don’t. There is no way that someone can write notes for their entire life and keep them detailed enough to pass as a normal in everyday life. Right? Think of all the details. Updating herself on every day of her life every single morning? I’m skeptical. Another point that creeped me out a bit was London’s relationship with Luke. If every day is the first day you are meeting someone, it is beyond creepy that you would ever sleep with him. Or love him. Sure, I can see London trusting herself in her notes but she really had no reason to because she repeatedly wrote what she wanted next-day London to know, not what actually happened or what she needed to know. Neither Luke nor London are having a normal relationship here and I didn’t find myself rooting for either of them.

The mystery element of this book builds slowly and then just punches you in the face at the end. In a bad way. I know I would’ve enjoyed this book more if the unraveling was simpler. (click to see the spoilers through my Goodreads review) And I know that television shows exaggerate the amount of evidence that DNA and bodies can confirm but (also, spoiler on Goodreads review) Umm, yeah.

All in all, I still thought this book was an okay read. The problems I had were all plot and character related rather than dealing with the writing style. I’ll read more of this author's works.

3/5 stars

Before I Die
Author: Jenny Downham
Publication Date: 4/5/07
Publisher: David Fickling Books

Blurb (GR):
Tessa has just months to live. Fighting back against hospital visits, endless tests, drugs with excruciating side-effects, Tessa compiles a list. It’s her To Do Before I Die list. And number one is Sex. Released from the constraints of ‘normal’ life, Tessa tastes new experiences to make her feel alive while her failing body struggles to keep up. Tessa’s feelings, her relationships with her father and brother, her estranged mother, her best friend, and her new boyfriend, all are painfully crystallised in the precious weeks before Tessa’s time finally runs out.

Review:
Tessa has been treated for leukemia for the past four years. Now, since her treatment options have been exhausted, she is spending her last few months completing a list of things she wants to do before she dies. The list includes some predictable items (breaking a few laws, driving, having sex) and a few curveballs (experiencing love, getting her parents back together) but most of the book is dedicated to Tessa’s experiences as she attempts to finish her list and come to terms with her death.

Have you ever seen that Dane Cook standup bit where he talks about how we cry? He starts off talking about how you just start out crying and then it goes downhill from there as we imagine all the worst things possible to make us cry even harder. I’m not advocating Dane Cook’s standup (I’m much more of a Jim Gaffigan girl) but I always laugh at Cook’s crying bit because he’s pretty spot-on. I read the first 50 pages of this when I was PMSing and I was like “This is so awful! It must be so terrible for Tessa and her family. She’ll never get to do x. She’ll never get to do y. Oh my God, it must be terrible for these families. Losing a child is horrible. This is awful for her brother. What if I lost MY brother? What if I died? What if one of my siblings died? I miss my grandparents. I can’t believe I wasn’t more there for my friend when she lost x. What will I do when I lose my parents?!” and by this point I can’t even open my eyes. So, yeah, I put this one back down for a week. Aaaand, when I picked it back up, I was able to complete most of the book with a straight face. (until the ending, when I totally lost it again) But the point is that I was mostly crying because I exacerbated the situation by my own volition. You might not cry in this one.

The writing in this one is pretty solid but I’m a little ashamed to say that Tessa is a frustrating character. She has a right to be selfish but she goes beyond that--she is often unnecessarily mean at times, mostly to her father. Her mother, on the other hand, deserves all the meanness Tessa could dish out to her. (which, sadly, doesn’t really happen) It takes a certain type of horribleness to abandon your sick child. It’s hard to know what to do when people are sick, or how to help your friends when they are losing or have lost someone. We are all pretty much winging it. But just being there is often enough—and Tessa’s mother couldn’t even be present for years of her daughter’s illness. She can join the father from another recent read of mine, Sisters in Sanity, in the Awful YA Parent Club.

I felt like the most interesting part of the book had nothing to do with Tessa’s list or her budding love. I most enjoyed her interactions with her brother. The factoids they shared and the frank discussions about what happens when you die were so interesting to me—I’m still thinking about the way the author described being buried under an apple blossom tree. (I loved that bit) And I also really enjoyed Tessa’s notes to her family and Zoey. These arent’ really spoilers, in case anyone is wondering…

I have no clue who I would recommend this to. My Goodreads friends are all over the ratings scale and I’m staking my flag down in the 3-star zone. I guess if you “enjoy” books about death and dying, or if you are looking for a cry, this might be a good pick for you. I mean, sometimes I watch Little Women just to cry when Beth dies. We’re all a little messed up—at least, I hope it’s not just me.

3/5 stars

Forbidden
Author: Tabitha Suzuma
Publication Date: 6/28/11
Publisher: Simon Pulse

Blurb (GR):  Seventeen-year-old Lochan and sixteen-year-old Maya have always felt more like friends than siblings. Together they have stepped in for their alcoholic, wayward mother to take care of their three younger siblings. As defacto parents to the little ones, Lochan and Maya have had to grow up fast. And the stress of their lives—and the way they understand each other so completely—has also also brought them closer than two siblings would ordinarily be. So close, in fact, that they have fallen in love. Their clandestine romance quickly blooms into deep, desperate love. They know their relationship is wrong and cannot possibly continue. And yet, they cannot stop what feels so incredibly right. As the novel careens toward an explosive and shocking finale, only one thing is certain: a love this devastating has no happy ending.

Review:
I was talking to Lyndsey about how it feels to have a brother and the best example I could come up with is this: It feels like that force when you try to put two similar magnetic poles together, but right at that moment when it starts to push away. The love I have for my brother is so strong but he repulses me at the same time. I mean, he’s great as an adult but he is the same kid who once filled his Skeletor action figure with urine and sprayed all 3 of his sisters with it. He is the same brother who once fed 4-year old Flann a concoction of mostly Tabasco sauce while we were being babysat. (My mother made him drink it when she came home, FYI) He is the same brother who used to put his stuffed Hulk Hogan resting above his doorframe so if we tried to come in, it’d fall on us. And he is the same kid that said, “Polly want a cracker?” like a parrot all the way from Texas to Seattle on a road trip. (according to my mother) How anyone could ever be attracted to their sibling is beyond me. I do understand that it happens, usually in highly stressful family situations, but I just couldn’t get over my repulsion while I was reading Forbidden. I wonder what the correlation is between people who enjoyed this book and whether or not they have brothers. Oh, I guess I was assuming that everyone who would read this review would already know what this book is about. If you don’t, SURPRISE! It’s about incest. (well, really it is about being in a terrible family situation)

This is written in first-person present, which really isn’t my favorite style, but I couldn’t get over the following:

“Summer gives way to autumn. The air turns sharper, the days grow shorter, gray clouds and persistent drizzle alternating with cold blue skies and bracing winds. Willa loses her third tooth, Tiffin attempts to cut his own hair when a supply teacher mistakes him for a girl…”
What is this? Most of the book reads like personal journal entries from Lochan and Maya’s present alternating perspectives but every once in a while there would be sections of text that were reflections on long periods of time. Overall, I thought the dual perspectives were successful but who writes their present thoughts like this?

Dear diary,
Winter approaches faster than usual this year. Crisp, frigid air creeps into town with snowstorms right behind it. I made chicken casserole for dinner tonight. I cooked the chicken too long so it was a bit dry.

A bit jarring, eh? That’s an extreme example of what I am talking about but you get the point.

I want to make a comment on the names in this book but can someone named Flannery actually do that with a straight face? I’m not even going to tell you my other family members’ names—let’s just say it would be the pot calling the kettle black on this one. (though we DO all have Irish names so at least there’s a theme!) Willa, Tiffin, Kit, Maya, and Lochan? It reminded me of that quote from Baby Mama when the one mother reminds her kids that they have a playdate later with Wingspan and Banjo.

I found the whole story a bit predictable but was it entertaining? Definitely. And the sex scenes were really well-done, even though it makes me feel really creepy and dirty to say so. I have absolutely no idea what makes people love or hate this—my Goodreads friends are all over the spectrum and not in a predictable way. If you can stomach reading about an incestuous relationship, give it a go. It is worth the read but it was just a 2.5-3 for me.

Thanks for sending me a copy, Arlene:)

3.5/5 stars

Where She Went
Author: Gayle Forman
Publication Date: 4/25/11
Publisher: Dutton Juvenile

Blurb (GR): It's been three years since the devastating accident . . . three years since Mia walked out of Adam's life forever.

Now living on opposite coasts, Mia is Juilliard's rising star and Adam is LA tabloid fodder, thanks to his new rock star status and celebrity girlfriend. When Adam gets stuck in New York by himself, chance brings the couple together again, for one last night. As they explore the city that has become Mia's home, Adam and Mia revisit the past and open their hearts to the future - and each other.

Told from Adam's point of view in the spare, lyrical prose that defined If I Stay, Where She Went explores the devastation of grief, the promise of new hope, and the flame of rekindled romance.

Review:
My heart gushed rivers of love when I reviewed If I Stay. I listened to the audiobook and just adored it because it felt like Gayle Forman tapped into my heartbeat and the rhythm beat right through to the end. I put off reading Where She Went because I wasn’t ready for another heartache. As it turns out, this is a rare instance where the sequel (or companion) has an entirely different tone than its predecessor. Rightly so, as Where She Went is told from Adam Wilde’s point of view, whereas If I Stay was primarily about Mia, his ex-girlfriend. In regards to spoilers, it is near impossible to have anything to say about this book without spoilering things about the first, but I think WSW can stand on its own even if you do know the setup. That said, I’m not going to use spoiler html on anything related to If I Stay. Since Mia decided to come out of her comatose state, she’s been studying at Juilliard. Adam’s band, Shooting Star, shot to the top of the charts and he is recognized everywhere he goes. The band’s two albums are filled with songs Adam wrote, and it should come as no surprise who served as the inspiration for all the lyrics. While he is dating a famous actress and has achieved so much musical success, Adam is disillusioned with life and the way Mia left things when she cut him off cold. Before he embarks on a world tour, he goes to one of Mia’s cello performances and gets the chance to speak with her afterward. Cue the life and relationship analysis…

Several reviewers have mentioned that this book wasn’t as enjoyable as it could’ve been because Adam seems overly angst-ridden for nearly the entire thing. Sure, I can see that. The whole thing just felt over-the-top, I agree, but I just loved the two of them together so I wanted to think their relationship could define Adam’s whole being, his anger, his disillusionment. I wanted to believe that he was missing his perfect complement. It was so interesting to me because the first book felt like an exercise in grief at the time I listened to it. I see now that, just like in life, the time right after a death is surreal. It doesn’t hit home for everyone at the same time. That book is about losing someone. (or many someones) This book is about the actual recognition of loss and the crisis that follows, whether it be from the end of a life or the end of a meaningful relationship. As someone who has seen what a terrible breakup can do to a person, it didn’t feel like Adam’s actions were beyond the realm of possibility. True, he was sometimes a prick. True, it didn’t seem like he tried to move on. I was just rooting for him to get his own life back together.

Where She Went reads like a novella. I watched as the percentage completed on my Kindle just flew by. For me, there were a few negative points—the lyrics at the beginning of each chapter (not because they were awful, only because it is cliché) and Mia, for starters. She came off as self-involved and I didn’t enjoy how aloof she seemed. I felt like I was holding my breath through a tunnel until the two of them actually start talking about something real. After that point, it was a much more comfortable read, despite the plot remaining heavy.
I was both happy and disappointed at the conclusion of Where She Went. I have to spoiler it and, for that, I apologize. **SPOILERS**I don’t think I’m encouraged by Adam and Mia getting back together right away. Mia has had 3 years to build up a life for herself. She said herself that Juilliard was more than she ever thought it could be. She thought of Adam but he didn’t define her. Adam, on the other hand, spent the last three years missing her, writing songs about her, and taking antidepressants and anti-anxiety pills to compensate for the void. He never had that time after the breakup to actually figure out who he is. They get back together—great, except I am still unsure how much he understands about himself. He seemed so willing to just give everything up for her…and I kind of believe he would do just that if she asked him. That’s depressing.**END SPOILERS**

Many people loved Adam in If I Stay and if you were one of them, I’m fairly confident you’ll enjoy this one as well. Forman does a good job of creating a realistic male voice and painting raw emotions on the page. And to the rest of you, if you can handle the angst and the foreverlove foreverandalways, give it a try. Hey, at least there’s not a love triangle.

I loved this video. The author gives a tour of many of the sites from Mia and Adam's whirlwind NYC adventure.

4.5/5 stars

Blurb (GR): Bean's past was a battle just to survive. He first appeared on the streets of Rotterdam, a tiny child with a mind leagues beyond anyone else. He knew he could not survive through strength; he used his tactical genius to gain acceptance into a children's gang, and then to help make that gang a template for success for all the others. He civilized them, and lived to grow older. Then he was discovered by the recruiters for the Battle School.

For Earth was at war -- a terrible war with an inscrutable alien enemy. A war that humanity was near to losing. But the long distances of interstellar space has given hope to the defenders of Earth -- they had time to train military geniuses up from childhood, forging them into an irresistible force in the high-orbital facility called the Battle School. That story is told in two books, the beloved classic Ender's Game, and its parallel, Ender's Shadow.

Bean was the smallest student at the Battle School, but he became Ender Wiggins' right hand. Since then he has grown to be a power on Earth. He served the Hegemon as strategist and general in the terrible wars that followed Ender's defeat of the alien empire attacking Earth. Now he and his wife Petra yearn for a safe place to build a family -- something he has never known -- but there is nowhere on Earth that does not harbor his enemies -- old enemies from the days in Ender's Jeesh, new enemies from the wars on Earth. To find security, Bean and Petra must once again follow in Ender's footsteps. They must leave Earth behind, in the control of the Hegemon, and look to the stars.


Review:  Oh, jeesh, where do I even begin? Okay, well I love Ender's Game and Ender's Shadow. No one really annoyed me in those two books. I can't speak to the remainder of Ender's series because I got so bored listening to Speaker for the Dead that I set is aside for a bit. I've finished off Bean's series with this one and phew, thank goodness it is over because I don't think I could've read/listened to another one. Why do I keep doing it? Good question. Answer: Because I do enjoy OSC's writing when his characters aren't talking about religion, military strategy, or BABIESBABIESBABIES. And the readers for his books are absolutely fabulous. I wish I could just have them walk around with me and narrate my life. Then again, I'd probably be lulled to sleep a little too much. As you can see by the graph, my annoyances hugely increased from Book 1 to Book 3. (I listened to them out of order) It was only downhill from there.

NOTE: The 10% I don't find annoying don't really make appearances in this series--Ender and Valentine.

2.5/5 stars