The Hollow Kingdom (The Hollow Kingdom Trilogy #1)
Author: Clare B. Dunkle
Publication Date: 9/19/06
Publisher: Henry Holt and Company

Blurb(GR): "She had never screamed before, not when she overturned the rowboat and almost drowned, not even when Lightfoot bucked her off and she felt her leg break underneath her with an agonizing crunch. But now she screamed long and loud, with all her breath."

Hallow Hill has a strange and tragic history. For thousands of years, young women have been vanishing from the estate, never to be seen again. Now Kate and Emily have come to live at Hallow Hill. Brought up in a civilized age, they have no idea of the land's dreadful heritage-until, that is, Marak decides to tell them himself.

Intelligent, pleasant, and completely pitiless, Marak is a powerful magician who claims to be a king-and he has very specific plans for the two new girls who have trespassed into his kingdom. The Hollow Kingdom is a 2004 Bank Street - Best Children's Book of the Year.

Review:

This book is exactly the type of fairy tale that I love the most.  Now, I know that I have been outspoken in the past about my dislike of fantasies featuring caveman, bad-boy type hero characters.  However, I think that I know and respect dozens of women who melt in the presence of these guys.  Do I look down on my friends for their fantasy preferences?  Absolutely not, because guess what?  We all have a fantasy weakness.  We all have that certain fairy tale that bypasses every logical part of our brains and just makes us feel giddy and excited.  So, you can safely assume that mine is decidedly not the perfect specimen, territorial, alpha male.  This book keys into the fairy tale that’s always turned me into a puddle of goo:

He’s ugly (but only on the outside, of course), a bit ruthless, desperate, smart, and he has one hell of a library.  Except that in this book, he’s comfortable in his own skin, and he doesn’t turn into a foppish, effeminate prince in the end (which is what I always wished would happen).

This book is not going to go down in history as one of the greatest works of all time, but I can feasibly see myself re-reading it whenever I need a bit of comfort.  It’s like the literary equivalent of a grilled cheese sandwich.  I was completely drawn in by
the prologue, and by the time the intelligent, practical, and resourceful heroine Kate and her plucky little sister Emily run into the Goblin King Marak I knew that this would become a favorite of mine. 

Marak is the ruler of a colorful, dangerous race of goblins, dwarves, and elves who live within Hollow Hill.  It is a long and traditional practice for the Goblin King to steal a human or elf bride and imprison her underground until the next King is born and his people are secure.  When Kate inherits Hollow Hill after her father’s death, she and her sister become the wards of two elderly great aunts and a shady, pretentious cousin.  Kate and her sister soon catch the eye of the Goblin King, but Kate is revolted and determined to escape his grasp at all costs.

As Kate and Marak engage in a battle of wills and wits, this book actually began to remind me of Pride and Prejudice.  These two characters have a lot of preconceived notions and ideas about each other, and their verbal sparring is charged and exhilarating.  Here is one of my favorite scenes:

”’Indeed it is, Kate,’ Marak agreed.  ‘It’s time to plan your revenge.  Goblins just adore revenge.’  He grinned.  ‘Do you have anything in mind?’

Kate was taken aback.  ‘Revenge is wrong,’ she told him solemnly.  ‘Vengeance belongs to God.’

The goblin put his head to one side and watched her through narrowed eyes.  ‘You won’t even give God a little help?’ he asked softly.”

Kate is independent and powerful, but not unrealistically so.  She’s a proper Englishwoman who reacts in realistic ways to her surroundings and the hideous goblin court.  And by the end of this book, she fits the specs for all of my favorite female heroines:  she’s determined, powerful, a bit merciless and bloodthirsty, and she has a sword (plus the most entertaining magical charm around).

My only “thirty year old woman” type gripe is that this book, despite being what I would class as a romance novel, is
clean enough to give to a ten year old.  Which is actually great for when my daughters get a bit older, but the lack of anything even mildly suggestive felt like a big gaping omission to me.

Perfect Musical Pairing
Joshua Radin – The Fear You Won’t Fall

This sugary sweet song is not something that I like to listen to all the time, but it’s a definite comfort food song for me.  This is a song about falling harder than you thought you could for someone, who may or may not love you back.

4/5 Stars

Hold Me Closer, Necromancer
Author: Lish McBride
Published: 10/12/10
Publisher: Henry Holt

Blurb (GR): Sam leads a pretty normal life. He may not have the most exciting job in the world, but he’s doing all right—until a fast food prank brings him to the attention of Douglas, a creepy guy with an intense violent streak.

Turns out Douglas is a necromancer who raises the dead for cash and sees potential in Sam. Then Sam discovers he’s a necromancer too, but with strangely latent powers. And his worst nightmare wants to join forces . . . or else.

With only a week to figure things out, Sam needs all the help he can get. Luckily he lives in Seattle, which has nearly as many paranormal types as it does coffee places. But even with newfound friends, will Sam be able to save his skin?

Review:
I guarantee you, if you read this book: (1) You will laugh; and (2) You will want to eat some waffles. I have eaten three waffles in the past two days just because of this book. (Fine, it was also because someone else made waffle batter and it takes a minute to make once all that work is done:)) But in all seriousness, this book is buckets of awesome. Samhain Corvus LaCroix (Sam) is a Seattle college dropout working at a fast food restaurant with a few of his friends and generally slacking it up in his off-time. After an unfortunate potato hockey accident behind the restaurant, Sam comes into contact with an intimidating man who recognizes Sam for what he is—a necromancer. Clueless, Sam is faced with an ultimatum before he even comes to terms with his dead-controlling ways. Craziness ensues.

Author Lish McBride uses short song snippets as the titles for the chapters and they are fabulous. I think my heart just about exploded when I got to the one entitled “Make A Little Birdhouse in Your Soul.” (My first concert besides Raffi and the parentally-enforced-you-must-love-being-Irish Chieftains concerts I went to with the family was They Might Be Giants, which I think is a totally respectable first concert, no?) Anyway, I loved every single one of them. It might be a little annoying to some people but I thought it went well with the overall campiness. Crowinator got there before me but she is dead-on that this book reminded me of a mixture of Buffy’s fun and the snarkiness of Dead Like Me. Sam very much reminded me of George from Dead Like Me—a sarcastic yet compassionate slacker working at a just-for-the-money job, only Sam is far nicer than George ever was. And he has his kickass friends, one of whom is a head in a bag. Yeah, you read that right. A head. In a bowling bag. The sense of humor is dead-on and the story was fun in the same way that Paranormalcy was. It felt fresh in a genre where originality can be hard to come by.

This book has it all, and I almost feel like Stefon from SNL could do a wonderful recap of what this book has to offer: Crazy garden gnomes that want to kill you, a talking cat that is really a dragon, sexy werewolves, a head in a bowling bag, medicine bags that make people invisible to supernatural radar, a Catholic schoolgirl harbringer that loves waffles, sex in a cage, and ZOMBIES. You get the idea. The pacing is quick but unhurried and the story arc is complete at the end yet leaves itself open to future books that I really hope will exist despite a lack of parenthetical series markers on Goodreads. It would be a huge shame if this was a standalone.

4/5 stars