Fine, I'm joking about this. (No, I'm not.) But Roberts really does have certain formulas in her books that show up repeatedly, and after listening to four In Death books in a row, I kept thinking about the formula for a book in the series. Please know before proceeding that I am absolutely addicted to this series, so it's all in jest. Roberts could write a book where all of these things happen three times each and I'd still read it/listen to it and love the experience. So, I present to you:
50 Things Very Nearly Guaranteed to Occur in an Installment of J.D. Robb's In Death Series
2. A dinner with red meat and/or pizza (or more likely, two dinners, one of each)
3. Someone is stealing Eve’s candy!
4. Eve bribes Dickhead (the lab guy) with baseball tickets.
5. Obligatory mention of the cat, Galahad.
6. Uh oh, it’s a back and forth between Eve and Summerset. (or four)
7. “Go ahead! Speak to my superior!” His name is Whitney, and he’s always on my side.
8. Mira is looking very put together, looking serene, and drinking tea in her pastel pantsuit.
9. Does Peabody’s butt look big in this?
10. She-body joke from McNab.
11. Also, sexy time for Peabody and McNab, to which Eve will roll her eyes and/or tell them she feels uncomfortable or to get a room.
12. Surprise! The case has some connection to Eve. (Does every killer have it out for her?)
13. Roarke owns the building/s/every building they go to.
14. Look at this new invention I’m working on!
15. Eve has a hot shower. (101 degrees, too hot according to Roarke)
16. They probably have sex in the shower, though.
17. Time for the tube of Pepsi from the vending machine! Angry words may or may not be had.
18. Eve questions where some piece of clothing came from in her closet. (Spoiler Alert: ROARKE BOUGHT IT, HE BUYS ALL YOUR CLOTHES, WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS QUESTIONING THIS?)
19. Roarke gets so caught up in the sexytimes that he cannot help but tell Eve he loves her in Irish.
20. Despite cop protocols in real life and the fact that he is involved in every business venture in the galaxy, Roarke will always be involved in every case. (and also smarter and better at computers and business than everyone else)
21. Eve will move most of the operation to her house instead of Cop Central, but everyone seems okay with that since there will be lots of tasty food.
22. Eve will be referred to as “Roarke’s cop” by at least one random person.
23. Is this REAL coffee?
24. I bet you forgot that Baxter and Trueheart were in this series. Isn’t Trueheart such a babyfaced cutie?
25. Eve has a nightmare.
26. Roarke doesn’t know what to do but obviously does the right thing.
27. Roarke will dig into someone’s finances and ALWAYS find some hidden accounts.
28. Also, he will bypass a security system.
29. Mention of licensed companions and some futuristic drugs like Zoner and Rabbit.
30. Good cop/Bad cop interrogation of a suspect
31. There’s a room in Eve and Roarke’s mansion that Eve didn’t know even existed! (Seriously? Who hasn’t gone in every room in their house? Even if it has 100+ rooms, I think it could/should be done.)
32. Did Leonardo design that outfit?
33. Look at the baby! Here’s Mavis! Remember how Eve and Mavis are BFFs even though they never seem to really be supporting each other or hanging out?
34. Trina does a makeover.
35. Eve and Roarke function very well for only sleeping about 3 hours a night…
36. Until Eve is so exhausted that she passes out in her clothes and Roarke finds her.
37. Roarke fingers the button of Eve’s he keeps in his pocket.
38. Nadine’s hassling Eve for info on the case and Eve has no comment except “they’re pursuing all leads.”
39. A page later, Nadine’s getting an exclusive.
40. Feeney’s leading up the geek squad with his puppy dog eyes. Best cop Eve knows. He’s her inspiration.
41. You don’t want to interrupt Roarke at work, Eve? Too bad, Caro’s been told to put you right through.
42. Peabody will be hungry on the job. (Pro-tip: Pack some snacks for the road.)
43. Did you know Peabody came from a family of “Free-ager” hippies?
44. “How do Charles and Louise get on so well as a couple? How does she live with his job choice?” Eve wonders.
45. Let’s make a murder board!
46. “They’re mine now.” (the victims)
47. Mention of the utilitarian beauty of Eve’s cop car, courtesy of Roarke.
48. Eve will double park her car in front of a ritzy building and sass the doorman.
49. Roarke will notice Eve’ tired eyes and plan a nice evening for them. (With meat. Both kinds.)
50. “Totally mag.”
The books I recently listened to were Indulgence in Death, Treachery in Death, Big Jack, New York to Dallas, and Celebrity in Death. Absolutely the only issue I have with the audiobooks is Peabody's nasally voice but the narrator must've picked that voice in the beginning and she sure cannot change that thirty books later. Four of those were on my 110+ Books list so my count is up to 10!